“Forgiveness
is an act of the will, and the will can function regardless of the temperature
of the heart.” -- Corrie ten Boom
I am thoroughly convinced
that there are no stronger words in the English language than “I forgive
you.” We have all been on one side of that or the other, and I would
venture to say probably both. It is tough to forgive, and it is tough to
be forgiven. We all have relationships that we avoid because of
baggage…we all have chips on our shoulder that still sting….we all have
hatchets buried with the handle still sticking out.
I love the above quote.
It is from an amazing lady of intense value and foresight. It speaks to
the fact that we have the power to forgive beyond what we “feel.”
Sometimes, we don’t want to forgive because someone doesn’t deserve it, we have
been hurt too badly, or we just can’t be vulnerable again. But, often times,
if we are truly honest with ourselves, when we are not forgiving, it only hurts
us. We feel shackled or tied down when we are giving that power to
someone else.
I have heard someone say that
relationship aren’t 50/50….that it isn’t about meeting in the middle. They
say, and I agree, that is 100/100. It takes both people willing to go all
the way to the other one, regardless of their actions. That is true love
or a true desire for a relationship. That is taking that first awkward
step in saying “Hey, I know we have had our issues in the past, but I want
something better” or “Hey, I know I have made you mad in the past, can you
forgive me for ____.” None of that is easy, but wow would it be freeing,
if we could all do that!
Below is a link to an AMAZING
article on the benefits of forgiveness from a health standpoint from the Mayo
Clinic. It really lays out well the stress our bodies and minds are
under, if we can’t forgive.
A quote that spoke to me is “If you're unforgiving, you might pay the price repeatedly
by bringing anger and bitterness into every relationship and new experience.
Your life might become so wrapped up in the wrong that you can't enjoy the
present…You might lose valuable and enriching connectedness with others.”
My challenge to you this weekend is to think honestly about
relationships that need some forgiveness from you….think about the benefits
that you could receive from letting go of that baggage. I encourage you
to do it. It will make you a more effective educator, citizen, and give
you a few more days to travel around the sun!
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